I've been very very very busy this month. I have been on my SICU rotation and it has been taking up a lot of my time. In addition to the fantastic care I have been giving to patients I have also been trying to research PGY2 programs to interview with at midyear. I will be interviewing at my current program the week after midyear but since staying is not a guarantee and because it is a good idea to network I am going to have ~30 minute interviews with about 9 different programs to get a feel for programs that I might want to apply to depending on how the interview with my current program goes. I am excited to talk with the different programs and learn about them but I have to say that since B signed with his company here in our current city I am not terribly motivated to leave, especially if he can't come with me. Everyone says it is just a year and that is true but over the last month or so of thinking about it all I have come to the conclusion that at this point in my life I don't think any career move is worth giving up all the other parts of my life for it even if it is just for a year. If I have to move hundreds or thousands of miles away from B I know that I'll be terribly unhappy. He is my person and I need him close to me.
All of that being what it is, I also know that it is quite extreme to say I'll just forgo a second year if I can't be in the same city as B... so I am trying to compromise by looking broadly at programs with a focus on programs in the general area that we are currently in so that if I have to leave and he can't come too then at least we'll be within driving distance and get to see each other on weekends etc... That being said, I am really really really hoping that I get to stay in my current hospital for my second year for so many reasons... Obviously there is this thing with B that makes me nauseous when I think about it too much but that is just one part of it. I really like my current program even when it makes me crazy... I enjoy the preceptors and the organization I am with right now and I really think that a second year there could teach me a lot. I like the idea that the preceptors will have a good idea of my knowledge base going into my second year and that I will be able to continue working with systems that I know. I like that the clinicians within my program are so super supportive of us as residents and take our feedback seriously. I like that they are so dedicated to what they do and I also love that they are as dedicated to teaching as they are to patient care. I know some of them probably read this blog and so I will just stop there before this starts sounding cheesier than it already does...
Anyway, I am excited to go to midyear and talk with other programs and I am excited to see if I'm going to get to stay at my current hospital.
As it is the day after Thanksgiving I feel it only appropriate to list some of the things I'm thankful for...
1. my sister - she cooks for me and keeps my company which is awesome
2. B and his fabulous family who send me food from their Thanksgiving and always make me feel super welcome when I go there
3. my really understanding family who work around my crazy-ass schedule which includes picking up hours at a pharmacy outside of my residency to earn extra $$$
3.5. the fact that I have the opportunity to pick up extra hours to make that extra $$$
4. my excellent co-residents :-) you guys are great and I am so glad to be experiencing this madness with you three
5. that I am lucky enough to be in a great residency program, as stressful and maddening as it is at times
6. that I am generally healthy and happy and even when life is difficult I am typically able to hold it together and I very rarely cry at work ;-)
7. that the people I encounter who are crappy and make me want to pull out my hair are really not that important in the grand scheme of things and I will only have to deal with them for a finite amount of time
That last one was maybe a little more passive aggressive than is my style but I'll leave it because I truly am thankful that the really annoying people that show up in my life tend to be pretty transient.
Ok folks, that's all for now.
goodnight
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