So Mr. Buddy Boy has been challenging me this weekend. B worked 8-8 both days which means it was the mom show all day both days... This would not be an issue except Buddy was grumpy. I mean really grumpy. He wanted me to hold him but also kept pushing away from me. If I put him down to play he would crawl toward me whining. This is all well and good when it lasts for 20 minutes before a nap but this was basically all day with a few sweet fun moments thrown in to keep me partially sane. I try really hard to keep smiling and trying to make him happy because I just feel so lucky to have these days with him but I wish he would make it a little easier sometimes. It seems like every time we have a weekend with just the two of us he has a state of continuous meltdown. He really is teaching me patience like I have never needed to know before. It is amazing to me how I can be so full of love for him and so frustrated with him at the exact same moment.
I have been reflecting recently because a question I get a lot when the baby comes up is "is he a happy baby?" I think this is a strange question, especially for a first time mom... I mean, he doesn't seem depressed... But I have no idea - he's my only baby. I don't know anything else. But it makes me wonder, is he happy? Being a parent is such a crazy experience and most of the time I feel like B and I are just totally making things up as we go along. Buddy boy laughs a lot when he's in a good mood but if he isn't there is just almost nothing we can do to make him happy. He has very strong emotions :-) and that is what I usually tell people when they ask - is he happy? Sometimes... And sometimes he isn't and either way he lets you know.
Ok that's all for now. Buddy went to bed tonight at 6:45 and he's in a onsie rather than pajamas... Mom of the year folks.
Later.
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